Friday was homecoming which meant there was one massively huge chapel instead of two. As a chapel scanner I normally arrive at chapel around 9:45 but this day I didn't need to be there till 10:25 to be ready for the 11:00 chapel. I woke up early to talk to some friends in the Philippines, had a great time, then had plenty of time to finish getting ready for my day. "Mistakenly" I started getting ready at 9:00 (planning on being there at 9:25) instead of 10:00. So I arrived at the chapel building, confused as to why it was so empty - the computers to scan weren't even set up. It was just the chorale members who were arriving early to practice. At this point I still hadn't realized my "mistake" of arriving 1 hour early. So, I sat down to wait for other scanners and read a magazine.
The student secretary came up and asked me if I was just here early for scanning. I just assumed she didn't know I had to be there at 10:25 and really everyone else was late. So I said yes, then she asked me a strange question. "There is a chorale girl who feels like she is going to have a seizure. Can you sit with her so the other chorale members can practice?" I said, "uhh, sure," thinking that I was crazy to do such a thing - I am possibly the least medical person you know. If this girl actually has a seizure I would not know what to do! I walked into the dark room where the girl was seated with two of her friends. They thanked me for coming and said "she feels like she's gonna have a seizure, thanks for sitting with her." Then left, I was like Gee, thanks. Now what do I do? If this girl really has a seizure, I don't have the slightest clue what to do. So, I just sat there and waited.
After awhile the silence grew awkward. I didn't know what the girl was feeling, aside from the supposed crumminess that an on-coming seizure makes you feel. So, I started to strike up a conversation, not knowing if she wanted silence or a distraction. She enthusiastically responded to most questions, so I thought the break in silence was okay. Quickly my heart went out to this girl - what kind of life it must be to be plagued with this illness and the constant fear of having a seizure at any moment. She took meds together that she shouldn't have and was assuming the blame herself for causing the pre-seizure symptoms. After the conversation died down (I mean really, what is there to talk about in a situation like that? The weather, the colts? I don't think so...) I continued to pray for her in my heart. I prayed for healing, peace, comfort, encouragement, and that the Lord's will would be seen and done in her and I. After about 15 minutes of prayer I would lose words, then there'd be awkward silence till I couldn't bare it any longer, we'd attempt a conversation, and then I'd start praying in my heart again.
So I get to looking at the clock and think chapel should start any minute... then it hits me... and I realize that it's only 9:45 at this time and I didn't have to be there till 10:25. Humbly I admit to you that I was frustrated that I arrived so early when in reality I could've returned to bed and got a nice long nap before coming. But, then my second thought was the reason for writing this story. I honestly believe God ordained me to arrive there 1 hour early just to sit with this girl. It was not a mistake to Him that I came early - it was part of His plan the whole time! I was humbled that He would use me in such a simple way. But I still had no clue what that meant - if this girl had a seizure I would be of no help at all. Either way, I accepted this as a responsibility and continued to fervently pray for her.
Then the girl told me she was really nauseous and then pulled a trash can close and was literally huddled around it. Maybe you knows this and maybe you don't - but I do not deal well with vomit; chances are high that if this girl lost it, then i would lose it too. Again, this girl had no idea who I was. She was weak and in a vulnerable state. I'm sure she would have preferred to be with her friends or family, not a stranger. I know that when I'm sick I want left alone. But, how could I leave her now? I could not do such a thing! She needed someone there with her, though I was not really qualified (medically), I was the only one there to do it, in fact I'm the one who was called to do it.
Eventually I felt the spirit's conviction to talk to this girl about how I thought the Lord led me there. But, I kept giving myself excuses why I shouldn't. When she was super nauseous, I told myself she just needed quiet so she could rest. When the chorale was loud with practicing, I told myself that I would have to speak too loud above them to be heard. I told myself that it is just a coincidence, I told myself that prayer will be enough, and I told myself that I'd look like an idiot sharing this with her. I didn't know anything about this girl's faith or conviction, whether she's in a deep relationship with the Lord, a shallow one, or none at all. I didn't feel like I was qualified to share with her (dumb feeling) like I wasn't qualified to take care of her medically. Eventually the conviction won out and I shared. I just worked up the nerve and once the first words came out I was fine.
"You know, I arrived really early by mistake today. But, I don't think it was a mistake. I think God sent me early so I could sit with you so that you don't have to be alone. It's a pretty simple task. While I hope and pray that you don't have a seizure and that you feel better soon, I know God is here and He's working with a purpose." She just smiled and looked down. Then I told her I'd been praying for her and will continue as long as I'm in the room and she's feeling ill. At that point she smiled even bigger, looked up at me, and said thanks.
I don't know what that meant to her. I don't know if it made a lasting impact or not. What I do know is that we serve a mighty King and I was obedient to His calling. Surely she was encouraged like I was to know of God's faithfulness in the midst of trouble and how He uses His servants in simple ways to reach out.
Less than 10 minutes later I asked her how she was feeling and she said she didn't think she was going to have a seizure anymore - the feeling completely passed. I had goosebumps when she told me. You know what I think? What I know? God healed her - He answered prayers and touched her body. I consider this a miracle. I can only think that if I would've verbalized my witness to her earlier that He would have healed her earlier. Nonetheless, God worked in His perfect timing and used me to be a part of this. I know I learned a lesson from this - to be obedient to His calling and vocalize my faith. I'm still praying for that girl (whose name I left out for privacy). Not necessarily that she's still seizure free, though that's important, but more importantly that her eyes are open to God's work in her life!
I think I'd willingly sacrifice a nap any other day for something like that to happen again!
No comments:
Post a Comment